A Gallery Listing

Collecting words & images for my vision board (Photo credit: deb roby)

Time to revisit some thoughts and ideas. Ever heard of vision boards or dream boards? They are often described as visual representations of your dreams and desires. Some have inspirational quotes and symbolic representations of things, plans or aspirations in a collage manner. Some see them as a focus point when it comes to the law of attraction. The definition is broad but I think you get the idea of what one is if you have never heard of such before.

In my home office I have several vision boards. When going through a transformation you often are awaken to some issues you might not have been aware of before. Just the other day I wandered in the office in one of those awakening modes to see my boards truly did not reflect me but the desires others had implanted in my brain for years. The visuals represented what I could do for them but not where my heart flowed. Another board was all about my family with one key component missing, me. Down went the boards and all the visuals. The sayings and quotes found a nice keep box; though not reflective of the inner me, the items reflected a time period and many positives I wish to remember. A smash book will be created down the road for these goodies. Spent some time thinking about me. What do I desire? What makes me happy? What do I see me doing in a year… in 3 years… in 5 years? Gathered some visual clippings, a few quotes, and some items in a box. The new boards are a work in progress right now.

To create a reality based on the law of attraction and some wise advice with a twist from a dear friend, I created “shingles” to hang by my visuals. The old saying about “hanging out your shingle” to note your business is what I applied. Often heard the more shingles you had the better you were. So I created a shingle for every title I will claim over the new three years, and a few distant future ones. One distant shingle I wish to hang by my name is “Appalachian Trail Through Walker.” Lofty goal but one I hope to see happen. Another is “Donna Duff, Expressive Arts Therapist.” A current work in progress via alternative routes but a reality in the near future. I believe seeing my name with the title makes the reality believe able.  A picture of my former skinny self is also on a board. The shingle reads the size I will be hopefully sooner than later. So, not all shingles are professionally related, just facts I will claim.

The same wise person made a comment when I was talking about my bucket list. “Why so negative? You are talking about things you want to do before you die. Why can’t it be a positive list name?” Being of an artistic nature, the title changed to gallery list. I view a visual of all the wonders, such as I say of the art I see in galleries, of the things I desire. I do believe a gala celebration of the opening of my personal gallery is in order once it is completed for this stage of the game. Why not? I cannot think of a better reason to celebrate a visual collection of wonders than to throw myself a personal little party. To my gallery of life show!! What is listed in your life gallery?

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We may never know why

Nothing is certain in life. Even with all the technology and modern science, we cannot predict everything. Try as we may, there is a risk even with every breath we take. Bad things happen despite all plans. Mistakes and trauma occurs no matter how many precaution and preventive actions have been taken. Life happens. It will always happen, whether we like it or not.

Out of crisis, mistakes, and unexpected turns of events we can find positives if we look deep within ourselves. Painful as it maybe at times there is a lesson learned or an altered path to be taken. Life moves on. We cannot stop it.

Have I handled my situations correctly? No. Have I learned every lesson from the unplanned and tragic events? No. Am I still dealing with my past? Yes. I still have fears. Still have regrets. Still have moments I would love to have a delete button or a rewind/redo chance. Don’t we all?

Life is not about me, it is about others. It is about moving past my issues to empower others. Why? Because in helping others I learn more about myself. I find my inner strengths I did not realize I had. I gain a better understanding when I must explain things to another. I grow in the areas of compassion when I help someone on their journey.

The next time life throws you a curve, step back and take a different perspective. We may never know why it happen but we might be able to learn how to change course to pursue another path on our journey.

My world centered around working with children with special needs. When I found out my child had challenges I experienced what I later realized were the stages of grief. Not something we think will ever happen to us. I did everything right so I thought. But, life happens. Then, I stepped back for a moment. For years I had been helping others who had children with challenges. The lesson was, why not me? I had the training and the knowledge to give this baby more of a chance than most I knew. So, why not me? She became my project. Many a day I wanted to give up because it is not an easy task. Often I wondered if we would ever reach certain milestones. It was so easy with her brother but with her, every moment was an adventure. Did you notice I didn’t say challenge? I reworked my vocabulary to reflect a positive. An adventure is a journey into the unknown, not doubt every day was exactly that at times. Instead of learning disabilities we called them brain farts. Hey, it made her giggle and others around her when she would refer to such a moment of misunderstanding as a brain fart. Life was a series of learning opportunities fill with music, art, dance, and a variety of creative teaching modes.

This week I reflect back on what I was told so many years ago. This young lady who will turn 21 in a few days wasn’t suppose to graduate from high school. She wasn’t to get her driver’s license or be able to hold a job because of her reading level. What she did do, with a positive attitude, and some creative intervention adventures was become a member of the Honor Society, win many awards for her acting ability, and earn an academic as well as a theater scholarship to a private college. She is a self-advocate who has a keen sense of self-empowerment to discuss her situations with professors and others. She now encourages her friends by sharing her own creative learning techniques. She plans to become a counselor to help girls like herself to become empowered and not fall to the negatives so many dwell on.

Well, I may never know why she had the issues she does but what I do know is the she taught me more about determination, challenged every creative inch of my being to find alternatives outside of the standard, and most of all, to never give up especially when my brain farts. ; )

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Hey, it is not target practice time!

shopping cart CEBIT-8542 (Photo credit: Harry Fichtner)

Not sure what was happening today but felt my car and my person had a big target placed on us. People were pulling out in front of me continuously. When I was crossing the street, cars would come racing up. Even in the grocery store buggies seemed to appear whirling around corners or up from behind causing me to dart out-of-the-way. Began to wonder if it was a warning my time was near to meet my maker. Even my daughter was getting a bit creeped out by the near misses we experienced just in the matter of a few hours.

Pondering the issues at play. Just seemed everyone was in a hurry. We often forget we are not the only people who exist on this planet. We are encouraging this behavior in our children as well by exposing them to the comments and impatient behaviors we often do not realize we are exhibiting. We have a mission, to heck with whatever happens between us and the event. We often misread situations because we  are often too focused on ourselves.

We share this planet. We share a community. We share the roads, the sidewalks, and the grocery store aisles. Sharing was once a part of the teaching curriculum many years ago. I believe today was a good example of why it needs  reinstated. The “ME” generation is causing some bad side effects by misguiding the self-empowerment via” everyone is a winner” and “I am the most important.” When life is focused around one person then others suffer. Greed, a bloated ego, and self-indulgence set in. The increase of stress and frustrations rise to give way to behavior problems. I think Roald Dahl‘s book, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, addressed the “ME” generation issues in his characters who won a trip to the chocolate factory. This book is a great teaching tool. You may know this piece of literature from the movie versions, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. The easiest way to teach children life lessons is from children’s literature. Most are even fun for adults to indulge a few moments in a quick read with powerful life applications.

How as a parent do I use children’s books to teach lessons? Easy! Take time to read a chapter or two with your child and discuss what the story you read was about. Ask how this might relate to situations experienced now. Each child in the story, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, exhibits a bad behavior. Though we do not have machines that weed out good and bad eggs in human behaviors as an example. there are ways people are sorted by their actions.  There are consequences for behavior issues. Ask your child to name a few consequences as you name bad behaviors. Then,  name good behaviors and consequences.

Sometimes we are not aware of how we are behaving because we reflect the norm of our community or families. If your child is having some severe behavior issues  not relate back to organic or other causes take a look at how the people around your child are acting. Often as parents we come home frustrated after a days work with attitudes we are not aware of. We may be snappy and sharp-tongued towards others.  Take a few minutes before entering the house after a trying day to calm and gather your thoughts to focus on a more positive before greeting your kids or others. Take time to transition from work to home. It will make a difference in how your children relate to the others and the world. No, never deny emotions, just get them into perspective.

Behavior is learned for the most part. Rude people reflect how they have been treated. Hurt people hurt other people. A depressed environment will spread as others venture into other places carrying their depression with them. How does your behavior reflect in public? What are you spreading?

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The Reason For YOU

“There is a vitality, a life force, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique, and if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium; and be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is, not how it compares with other expression. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep open and aware directly to the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open.” – Martha Graham

What an impact statement! If we raised our children with this statement in mind can you imagine what great things they would accomplish? We are each unique. No matter what challenge or issue you have a purpose no one but you can do because it takes the exact skills, knowledge, and unique twist that only you can bring.

When I work with clients, friends, and students I remind them that with every challenge comes a gift that is unique to them. It is our mission to take a journey to uncover the gift given and develop it. Many people are not aware of their gift. Actually, most people have more than one gift but it takes discovering the first to uncover the rest. Often people do not see the gift as it is but link it to the challenge. ADHD folks have a drive like no other. This drive and persistence can actually be a gift in another setting. One must find how the gift is best used by not focusing on the negative. Kids with learning challenges may not excel in one area but might have an uncanny ability in another if the text is read to them so they can comprehend. Learning disabled kids often think “out-of-the-box” making it possible for them to see problems and situations in a way most folks do not. They  are often excellent problem solvers given the opportunity to bounce ideas around. So, do not think a challenge means you have not gifts or exceptional abilities. You are unique despite what others say based upon a test score or an IQ test. Test do not determine your abilities other than on one particular day and moment.

Challenge those you meet to rise above and share their gifts. If they haven’t found their gift then help them discover what is unique about themselves. If everyone focused on what makes them unique and shares their true being with others, what a wonderful world it would be.

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Celebrating Creative Freedom on the Fourth of July

English: The Bill of Rights, the first ten amendments to the United States Constitution Česky: Originál Listiny práv, prvních deseti dodatků k Ústavě Spojených států amerických Deutsch: Die Bill of Rights genannten ersten zehn Zusatzartikel zur US-amerikanischen Verfassung, die den Bürgern bestimmte Grundrechte garantieren Español: La Carta de Derechos de los Estados Unidos, el término por el que se conocen las diez primeras enmiendas de la Constitución de los Estados Unidos de América (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Never thought about it this way until a friend mentioned it to me today. We are lucky in the USA to be able to express ourselves in so many creative ways. Our freedoms have afforded us the privilege. Via the arts we can sing, dance, paint, build, cook, and write in ways others cannot due to censorship and regulations.  We should honor the rights so many died so we could express ourselves which is protected by the First Amendment, freedom of speech.

With freedom does come responsibility. We should never abuse the right to express ourselves in a negative or abusive fashion. We should also respect the right of others to express themselves though it might be different from our beliefs and ways. As much as I enjoy Facebook and other means of social media, I find many who abuse the right with an onslaught of bashing and unnecessary over use of foul language. Sometimes such might be appropriate but not every other word. Nor is it ok to slander others in a revengeful or spiteful way. Sadly, so many children are following in the negative path of influential adults. Internet bullying, texting inappropriate pictures, etc. are becoming the norm amongst children as young as 8 years old.

Today, make this Fourth of July a celebration of creative freedom. From this day forward, make a difference by promoting the positive and avoiding the negative. Influence the young in the way our freedom of expression was intended, to encourage and motivate. Confronting wrong can be done without the use of a string of expletives and nasty pictures.

I hope where ever you are you celebrate today with fireworks painting the night skies, an abundance of colorful foods, with laughter and song, and lots of stories of your families journey to celebrate the event. Happy Birthday, America! Let Freedom ring for many more years to come.

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An App for meeting deadlines to increase productivity

English: 2 gregorian calendar examples (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

In my search for  great apps to help  students and adults with ADHD and learning challenges stay organized I have come across another winner. Countdown + is a creative event count down reminder. You can choose the picture to go with multiple countdowns.  You can countdown days to assignment deadlines, meetings, appointments, and games. My daughter is a huge fan of this app. As a theater major, this app comes in handy to keep up with schedules and rehearsals.   She enjoys checking the app for how many days she has left before a deadline or event. Please check this app out if you have problems remembering extended dates and long range deadlines. It is well worth the try. Plus, it is a FREE app on iPhone.

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Why your child with ADHD or learning challenges should play sports

Sports and games (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

There are the obvious reasons such as learning team work, running off excessive energy, and developing social skills. Some least expected gains from participating in sports might shock you. Did you know most high school and college programs are required to monitor grades? Due to the high demands of eligibility to play sports many schools offer afterschool tutoring programs for athletes. Coaches become very proactive to keep players’ grades in safe zones. Often coaches will spend time mentoring and providing guidance during tough academic times for struggling athletes.

Another less known benefit of participating in sports comes from spotting learning challenges by the way students respond. As a special education teacher, my husband, a coach, would talk to me about a situation observed while a student was running a play. I have stepped in to lend my area of expertise. Some of the issues found were vision perception problems, eye-hand coördination, and undiagnosed dyslexia. A playbook is not always easily read and learned by students with hidden disabilities. I have often stepped in to color code and adapt playbooks for football players.

Athletes with some visual perception problems will often shy away from fast balls coming directly towards them. Working with the Wii gaming system can help improve the eye-hand coördination as well as the shy away response. As with all gaming systems, the sports games build in speed and skill. Having a virtual ball come at your repeatedly can help develop more confidence while building reaction time and coördination. For students who have problems with foot work, the Just Dance games can help. Even Guitar Hero helps with visual processing and eye-hand coördination. The more these areas are developed the more those skills will likely transfer to the sports field.

Team sports area great for helping children understand the importance of patience, trouble shooting, and impulse control. All players must depend on each other for a win. Even though there are those that excel more than others, all members of the team are needed for a win, even the bench warmers. Those that do not play much are needed to encourage and support. Never under-estimate the power of a positive motivating team-mate when the chips are down to pick a team back up. Many a losing team have kicked back in at the last second of the game to pull out a win due to a player’s encouragement when the majority of the team had already given up.

Being a part of team has benefits no matter the player’s level of performance. A member of a group helps build self-esteem in children who struggle due to those invisible disabilities such as ADHD, ADD, and learning disabilities. On many a playing field, the disabilities are not noticed. If they are there is often a different sort of acceptance among athletes that is not found in the classroom. Some students with such challenges often are gifted in sports which acts to balance out the struggles happening in the classroom. Having a purpose will motivate athletes to seek help in their academics in hopes to be able to keep up eligibility to move on to the next level. Often colleges hire learning specialist to help with the transition from high school to college level academics. Knowing there are people willing to help and guide an athlete towards making the grades will keep the athlete from becoming depressed. Depressed students with learning and behavior challenges often seek negatives to fill the emptiness and discouragement. This is a downward spiral leading to jail or worse. In my experience as a high school coach’s wife I have seem many lives changed for the positive due to sports. I have also witnessed the downfall of those who dropped out of sports resulting in negative and harmful alternatives.

If you questions the benefits of sports for students with ADHD/ADD and learning challenges trying search the internet for professional athletes with ADHD and learning challenges. Read the hundreds of stories about how sports saved lives and built self-esteem.

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Apps for ADHD support

Inspirational Quotes about time Benjamin Franklin (Photo credit: hot4sunny)

Another great app on iPhone to help those who need support while working on tasks. Check out 30/30. This app is a timer you can set for how long you wish to spend on a task. The nice thing is that you can customize it to fit your needs. It is colorful so it has lots of visual appeal. The longest time is 30 minutes, difficult for some but plenty of time especially if you are working on a computer-based project. Everyone needs breaks to rest their eyes, an important fact to consider.

This app would be great to use in the classroom as well as in the office. It could be a great homework support so your child doesn’t get too bogged down in the books. Give it a try, let me know how you used it and if it worked well for you.

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Apps to help with Organization

English: Various remote controls fot TV-set, DVD and VHS. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

My life is surrounded with ADHD/ADD sorts. I also have a good dose of it myself. Lately with all the distractions of starting my business I have discovered my old tricks of dealing with my own distractions have not been working.

Many do not understand the ADHD/ADD mindset. Honestly, we who deal with it daily have a hard time explaining it. The best way I can describe what is happening inside our heads is via an example in which you might be able to experience. Imagine a place like Best Buy, or Wal-Mart where televisions are sold. If all the televisions were located in one room so you are surrounded by them except for the door, then someone turned them all on with the sound wide open. You are in this state while someone is trying to talk to you on your cell phone or someone walks into the room to tell you something important. The assault on the senses and memory are very much like being in such a room. There is no one remote control that will cut the sound down or turn off the visuals. You might have a bucket load of remote controls getting lucky from time to time to reduce the assault from a few of the televisions but most likely you would go through many before finding ones that work. Do you get the mental picture of how your brains are working? We never know what will trigger the mental bombardment of ideas and heaven, knows we try to cut the on slaughter of ideas happening but we cannot.

A great friend who suffers from such moments happened upon an app which has changed my life. Thank you for sharing, Mark! This app is for iPhone. For a creative it provides the unexpected twist to being an app task master. We, creatives with ADHD/ADD need more than a ping or color flash to motivate us. We need attention stoppers and twisted rewards. We become like Pavlov’s dogs as well list more items to our to-do list to get the brash and often hilarious responses which triggers us continue with the cycle. We love the written zingers and zany rewards, it fuels the creative inside of us as well as becomes an addiction which drives a productive side effect. Now if a person insulted me or gave me a binary lesson I might not be so thrilled but coming from this electronic fictional character called CARROT, I am highly motivated and driven.

CARROT is a to-do list task master with a twisted sense of humor. If you ignore your list, Carrot will say some… well, you must experience the sharp tongue of this wicked little task master to understand. If you like humor with a side of sarcasm then Carrot is the app to-do list for you. There is another twist, if you work through so many tasks Carrot will give you a virtual cat to take care of. You attention to making your list and completing tasks will gain you access to caring for your virtual pet. Beware if you do not visit daily with progress, Carrot will shame you. You virtual cat’s life will also depend upon your attention to your to-do list as well.

If you need a creative motivator, check out Carrot. It will most definitely will keep you motivated and productive with a side of laughter.

Check back for more apps for ADHD/ADD types.

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It starts with a dream

Tiny house designed by Jim Franklin

It doesn’t have to be a big one. It can grow from a thought. One thought that doesn’t go away, it keeps coming back. It bounces around your head now and then never leaving just hiding until the time is right to reappear. Might be a bit different because over time it grows and becomes. Over time, and much bouncing about in your mind as a glimmer of possibility it takes shape. You might even share it with another. Once shared it grows larger. Encouragement makes it take a form… a vision, maybe even a hint of reality. You might share it again just to see what happens.

Beware though, there are those who enjoy busting dreams. You must not fall prey to those sorts. Take the negative with stride, there might actually be a tidbit of wisdom in the kernels. Move past, do not dwell there. Do not allow the negative to form a gloom and doom patch on your dream. Wash it away with the light from another. Share again, do not let it end there.

It may be lofty. It may be outrageous. It may be impossible in the mind of some but what matters is that it is yours and yours only. You have the power to grasp the understanding of your own dream so do not depend on others to interpret it for you. Bounce it around more in different perspectives. What makes it take flight? What makes it glow? If you pair it with another thought, does it intrigue you more? Is it growing to the point you can almost touch it? What does it feel like? Can you smell it? Can you hear it? Can you taste it? Ah, that’s when you know it is ready to become. It is ready to move from your mind to reality.

Take the risk. Let it escape from thought… to dream… to realty. Some dreams are meant to come true. But, it all depends on you. Are you willing to accept your dream is more than a thought? Are you ready to live your dream? Then it is time to do so.

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